Detached Apathy

Another day passes by
As I go through the life
In same perpetual motion
Each day is the same till
I can’t tell yesterday apart
From tomorrow and today
From yesterday, weariness
To carry on with the mundane
A certain detached apathy
Lurks within my shadow
Invisible to the out-lookers
I wear a perfect smile and
Display the required emotions
As need be at times so life
Remains simple, eventually
Nothing requires effort
You don’t have to be there
To perform your daily chores
Or do the necessary socializing
All it takes is separating
Yourself from the body and
World and let detachment
Do the part it needs to as it’s
Easier this way and boring
Nothing is of interest and
People come and go while
I perform every relationship
As I must without feeling
Indifference for there is lack
Of depth I once craved for
And now life is much easier
For doing the do while letting
The mind and soul wander away
For peace and contenment

What dreams were made of

Part I of II

He was the sky after the storm
The ray of hope at darkest night
The last bite of chocolate that
You wish would last forever
The breeze that calm the nerves
After you barely survive the day
The ice cream you devour after
Hours under a burning hot sun
The music that lulls you to sleep
The words on pages spilled in
Delightful patterns enchanting
You with its perfect patterns and
Peaceful scent closed within it
His voice moving the strings that
Keep the heart from drowning
Under the noise of the world
The sound of symphony to touch
Your soul and lose yourself in it
A smile that will move the worlds
Electrifying and adding life to
Moments captured in memories
He was all that she had wished for
Only a figment of her imagination
He was what dreams were made of

About Time

He walks over to her and smiles
She is busy scribbling away
He clears his throat and sits down
She looks up and smiles warmly

He holds her small hands in his
She seems startled by this act
He keeps looking at her quietly
She blushes under his intense gaze

He hopes she would understand
She had always been good at this
He was always short of words
She always had enough for them

He opens his mouth to speak up
She puts her hand on his mouth
He looks at her questioningly
She shakes her head in a ‘no’

He wonders what that means
She beams and leans forward
He sharply exhales surprised
She was always a step ahead

He gently seals their moment
She had been his best friend
He whispers softly “I love you
She grins “About time, you idiot*

I wonder

I wonder what you were thinking
When those lines formed on your
Forehead in concentration while
You worked over and over trying to
Create perfection in all that you did
Oh love, nothing can be perfect

I wonder what you’d taste like
Under a grey sky and blue trees
As the butterflies flew over us
And the river flowed to the music
And a smile to make stars swoon
Oh love, don’t you wonder to

I wonder what’s happiness for you
Is it when you accomplish your goals
Or is it the midnight silence you cherish
Is it somebody who makes the world
You live in brighter and better for you
Oh love, for it certainly wasn’t me

I wonder what’s life like without me
Does the sun shines brighter now
Has success found it’s way to you
With no one to tilt the balance anymore
Writing words causing you to cringe
Oh love, I hope it’s all you wanted

I wonder if you wonder about me
Like I do in the middle of the night
In silence between conversations
In spaces between words written
In every heartfelt prayer and wish
oh love, for I hope you’re in peace

Link to the site:

Didn’t I my Dear?

You were the best thing that could ever
Happen to someone torn and twisted like me
That was how I knew you will never stay
But I wanted to come closer to happiness
Even if it was temporary and distorted by me
We joked and laughed together like peas in a pod
I was swept in the moments of delight and hope
You held me when I cried over my nightmares
You cheered when I reached for my dreams
In hours spent with you I forgot who I was and
Learned how to smile without fear but something
Always painfully gnawed on the inside of my mind
Lurking around, scratching to let me know that
My kingdom was never meant to last forever
Just as the voices got louder you opened up
Saying you wanted a little more than just friendship
My heart slumped to my feet knowing it was time
Instead of butterflies I felt tiny rocks growing
But I gave you what you wanted like all the times
I treaded on water without knowing how to swim
You never intended to keep me from drowning
I should have never told you what went on in my head
But I jumped in the water anyway tired of the games
You played with such delight and absolute control
I came up gasping for air alone and just like that
You decided to become a figment of my imagination
Between us, I accepted and acknowledged what I felt
And knowing you were gone all I could think was
“I really fucked it up this time. Didn’t I, My dear”

Note: The last line in quotes is taken from the song of Mumford & Sons, “Little Lion Man”

Not yours

Why do you want her?
She is trying to to find answers
You will not be able to understand
She reminds you of broken things
You had mourned over in your life
She left her heart on the road that
You will wish you never traveled
She has scars underneath her skin
You will regret knowing one day
She has lips bruised by lost love
You will wish you had kissed first
She is hidden in layers of masks that
You need a lifetime to get rid of
She finds solitude in hidden places
You will give up tying to find
She crawls into small dark alley
You want to build a home on
She is the wasted ink on pages
You desperately try to make sense of
She doesn’t wants to be saved
You can’t give up being the hero